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Top Eight Comments That Could Get You Killed

mom2.jpg

 

Hey all,
 
Today’s post is from Guest-Blogger: Vic-the-Preggo wife.


Top Eight Comments That Could Get You Killed (when said to a Preggo…)
 
1)      Haven’t you had that baby yet?
2)      Still Pregnant?
3)      How much of that is baby weight?
4)      Have you noticed that you’ve been moody?
5)      What else have you forgotten?
6)      When are your twins due?
7)      Do you need a crane to get up?*
8)      Isn’t that the 3rd time you’ve worn that shirt this week?
 
I have actually been asked most of these (I don’t recommend asking which ones), and will admit to spending some time thinking of how I would react to being asked the others. Ok- I actually admit to relishing the responses I would give them IF I were to be asked. 

Feel free to add on…
 
Vic-the-Preggo wife
 

*Note from Perk: I was actually THERE when this one was said, by someone most of you know. Almost lost a fishin’ buddy that day!

That’s all I’m gonna say about that!

 

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17 thoughts on “Top Eight Comments That Could Get You Killed

  1. Acerbic Villain on said:

    I decline to comment on the grounds that I may get an ass-whoopin’ from the preggo wife.

    🙂

    Nice laser sight by the way. 😉

    – av

  2. AV –

    Once again, you show wisdom beyond your years!

    Yeah, the laser was for Dane, lol!

    Actually, the picture freaks me out just a little, as I’ve often suspected that the last words I’ll hear in this life are, “How do you reload the %&@#$ thing?!?”

    -Perk

  3. Dinana on said:

    9. Whoa…have you seen your toes lately?

    Perk…advice…pedicures make preggo’s very happy…the excuse is that the can’t see nor reach their toes, but it feels wonderful any ol’ time!

  4. Dinana,

    Good advice, already doing so!

    -Perk

  5. Vic-the-Prego-Wife on said:

    Dinana- “Whoa…have you seen your toes lately?” Great one!! Also, Perk actually did a much better job on the pedicure than I (so he must have actually cared about it- unlike me).

    All- I realized I needed to clarify a couple of things
    1) Perk has NOT asked me ANY of the above. And
    2)I think mostly people think they’ve morphed into the funniest human alive when they’ve asked me the questions they have (#’s 1,2,3,5 &7). I’m finding the closer I get to my due date that these questions have gone from thoughtless to horrific. Translated: the longer you wait to ask these questions, the less gracious the answer/response. So it’s all fun and games until someone loses an eye, or their teeth, or their blood supply…

  6. “So it’s all fun and games until someone loses an eye, or their teeth, or their blood supply…”

    THAT’S my girl!

    -Perk

  7. Mary Lou on said:

    I still can’t believe that “can I take a picture of you barefoot and in the kitchen?” didn’t make the list. Hey why don’t you post the one you have?
    Or would that start a whole new list from Vic-the-Preggo?
    I will concede your win with that pic, but I am suprised that Karate kid didn’t try, or maybe he did and we won’t be hearing from him for a while.

  8. Mary Lou on said:

    My pastor’s wife added in “I heard on the radio that a woman’s brain shrinks 6% during pregnancy”
    Good luck to any of you that would like to try that one.

  9. “I heard on the radio that a woman’s brain shrinks 6% during pregnancy”

    Well, that would still give OUR wives a 94% lead on us.

    Shut up, Dinana!

    -Perk

  10. Vic-the-Prego-Wife on said:

    Mary Lou: “I still can’t believe that “can I take a picture of you barefoot and in the kitchen?” didn’t make the list. Hey why don’t you post the one you have?
    Or would that start a whole new list from Vic-the-Preggo?”

    Let me ASSURE you there would be a list, my friend. And YOU would be right at the tippy top of it!!

  11. …to which the husband replies…

    “Dude, I don’t know what picture you’re talking about!”

    -Perk

  12. I remember all of those questions. I feel like you on some of those…..shoot, ask questions later.
    It’s almost over Ms. Vicki, then the real work begins.
    Best Wishes,
    Stella

  13. Vic-the-Prego-Wife on said:

    Thanks Stella!

  14. Dinana on said:

    The best advice i can give is to not make eye contact during the last month, and just say “Best Wishes” because at this point, whatever you say to the Preggo, will be taken wrong. And we women are amazingly strong at 9 months.

    Perk-and your (former) co-workers at least 106% lead on you…

    New topic: Comments after the birth:

    1. They say nursing sucks the brains out of the mother.

    2. So, is she sleeping thru the night yet?

    3. So, how’s Perk with diaper changing?

    4. You know, now that my children are grown and out of diapers, I wouldn’t trade places with you for all the tea in China!

    5. Are you getting enough sleep? At your age it really matters!

    6. Stars get back to their pre-pregnancy weight right away…how are you doing with that?

    I’m sure there are plenty of others out there…

  15. Geoffrie on said:

    And to think that I have all of this to look forward to in my own life. Well, at least Sarah won’t seriously hurt anyone for the twins comment since she is actually carrying twins. Still….all I can say is never try to outrun a pregnant woman if she knows how to use firearms! I think the bullets in her gun could follow you around corners.

  16. Geoffrie,

    Pregnant women don’t NEED guns…

    CONGRATS ON THE DOUBLE BLESSING!

    -Perk

  17. Vikki on said:

    Newly Expecting mommy here! Used this to give my husband some DO-NOT-DO pointers for the near future. ; )

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